Tiptoe Through the Tulips

Or not....

photo credit: Anita van der Elst

A year ago this month, before my sister moved here, she came to visit me for a week. We had plans to go to the Tulip Fesitval down in Skagit Valley but a nasty tumble down some concrete steps put that trip on hold for another day. (Another year actually.) Yesterday we finally got to go!

top left/right: the face we make when its sister day!
photo credits: Anita van der Elst & myself.

Roozengaard  Gardens is amazing. Let me say this again, Roozengaard Gardens is AMAZING. The month of April, when the tulips are at their peak, is of course the best time to visit. Acres and acres of beautiful, luscious, riotous colors! Tulips, Daffodills and in a short while, Iris',  tantalizing your eyes. It's almost overwhelming the sheer enormity and breathtaking beauty of the fields that stretch out in a rainbow of colors.

Wow. Just Wow.

Sister and I had a marvelous time and we snapped happily away all morning and into the afternoon. If you don't like tulips or care to look at pictures, please, just skip the rest of my post. Otherwise, prepare to be PHOTO BOMBED!!!  (I wont post them all~~~I'll save some for another post)

Enjoy!

stay tuned for more....

do you know the way to san jose?

doo-doo-do-do-do-do-doo-do-doo-do-doo...

I could have easily picked 'going to the chapel' as my title but since I'm not the one who's 'gonna get married' the San Jose reference was more fun. OK, technically, we are not going to San Jose, it's actually Santa Clara CA but the vacation condo rental where we'll be staying IS in San Jose and the wedding is taking place in Santa Clara, right on the border of SJ. The IMPORTANT thing here is that there is going to be a wedding and I get to go!

Yes, on Wednesday evening this week I will be climbing in the backseat of my sister and brother in law's Buick and riding with them to Santa Clara for the wedding of their baby girl. This baby girl has a special place in my heart and there is a very sweet little story I want to tell you.

When MY baby girl was about 8 months old, I paid a visit to my sister who was living in S. Ca. She had 3 children at the time. The oldest, Christy Lou, was almost 4 and the twin boys were about 2. A full house to say the least. However, my baby girl was pretty adorable (still is of course) and Christy Lou,was quite smitten with this sweet little baby. Apparently, so smitten that she decided she needed a baby sister. And was bold enough to PRAY FOR ONE one night at the dinner table. As the story goes her daddy's eyes flew open and looking upward, was heard to mutter "Lord, I've got seniority!"  We chuckle over the retelling of this story because it wasn't really too long after, that my sister announced there was a baby (girl) (KJ) on the way!

When KJ graduated from high school she came to Washington  and lived with us for a year. We loved having her here and it was hard saying goodbye when the time came to move back to S Ca. We have remained close and so it is with great joy that I will attend her wedding at the end of this week!

The only sad part of this is that my sweetie will not be traveling with us. We just can't swing a trip for the 2 of us right now. He pretty much insisted that I should go though and who was I to argue? ;)

Of course this ROAD TRIP gives my sister and I one more fun adventure to share. Not sure how my brother in law will cope with the two of us in the car but it will be lively I am sure. Stay tuned for updates and pictures!!

Life Has Been....

Time keeps on ticking....whether I come to my blog or not!
Honestly, for a girl who was blogging 3-4 times a week, I sure have pulled back. Not on purpose... just life has gotten so busy-- in a good way-- and I actually FORGOT about my blog now and again!!

Life has been....

memory verses and dissecting of scripture = whew!

Busy...
My role as a small group coordinator for our church has had several weeks of ramping up as we launched several awesome studies.  That includes the small group my hubby and I are hosting, and the ladies study I decided to go ahead with. I felt like a match maker some of the time as I paired people up with small group leaders. Then there's the Precepts bible study I am doing with my sister-- which is still kicking my butt big time, but it is paying off as last night in a convo with hubby I stated my position in Christ (as a victor) in a strong and emphatic way that I have not always fully appreciated. So KUDOS for bible study!!

strong coffee and lots of colored pencils required

Satisfying...
The satisfaction from a job well done. Of gaining a better understanding of my position in Christ. Of growing in patience and grace. God has been refining and re-defining me in the last few months I think. I noticed the other day that some of the people who have long been on my EGR list (that's EXTRA GRACE REQUIRED-- a nice way of saying difficult people) while they have not changed (they are still on that list!) it seems I have...   it doesn't take as much effort for me to negotiate time spent with them. In fact, some of the people who I, honestly, tend to avoid, have logged into a place in my heart that astounds me. Amazing what happens when we submit to Christ and say 'there is no way I can love this person in my own strength, but I know you ask me to, so.... will you help me with this Lord?"

Joy Filled...
Our 17th anniversary came and went and we celebrated in a low key but truly fun way. We took a day trip to Port Townsend and Sequim and despite the rain SQUALL we experienced, we also experienced some truly spectacular views, reconnected with a sweet friend and most importantly, enjoyed our quality time together.

the view at Fort Warden, Port Townsend

My sister and I are also making up for lost time by enjoying many play dates together. In addition to taking the Precepts study together, we've been making applesauce, joy riding and building many new memories while laughing hard enough to pee our pants It's been crazy fun but also very fulfilling.

I have to also say how very very much I am loving the women's small group that the Lord directed me to start. It's a nice sized group of some very dear ladies. Just 5 of us each Tuesday morning. We are doing the same study that Bruce and I are doing in our Monday night small group; The Invisible War by Chip Ingram. It's about spiritual warfare and it's got some heavy stuff! But I love these ladies and the conversation is always lively and educational. I have been amazed at the level of transparency we've been able to move to in a relatively short amount of time. It helps that we already knew each other to some degree so it's not like we were starting at ground zero. Still, opening up and sharing is risky and daring and involves trust. I feel honored and humbled that I was asked to do this and that God is blessing me so richly. I guess this is a perk of being obedient to His call.

Level but not quite balanced...
Emotionally, psychologically speaking, as far as the dreaded depression goes, I feel GREAT. My med's are working and I feel leveled out. Life is calm. Life is stable. Life is good. It helps immensely to be on a regular walking regime and having achieved my goal of losing 20+ pounds has gone a long way towards helping me feel better about myself too!

walking every day. rain or shine.

The off-balance comes only in our personal finances as we once again struggle with the ups and downs of paying work for hubby. Self employment always has its drawbacks, the worst of which is too much time spent working for no pay. He has plenty of work lined up now for the rest of the year and most likely into the coming new year but we are still playing serious catch up for the months prior to this when work wasn't so great. It's tough going much of the time but our God is bigger and we are trusting in Him to carry us through.

So, yes, Life has been: An adventure as always. Rewarding. Surprising. Tense and intense. Never boring, never dull. I am grateful to be walking around with my eyes wide open, taking in every drop of sunshine, every drop of rain, embracing life, loving fully, laughing freely and living faithfully. May you be able to do the same.

the Good, the Bad, the Beautiful

Finding beauty in the day. My favorite view of Mt Baker and Twin Sisters, from Hwy 9

I have a very dear friend who always, and I mean, ALWAYS, finds beauty in her day. She inspires me to no end, with this attitude, especially since she is a cancer SURVIVOR. So, despite the good bad and ugly that you might expect to come with depression and physical pain, I am, PRAISE THE LORD, seeing beauty, not ugliness.

The Good:

• I do feel better. Stable. More evened out. Not so overwhelmed by little things like making phone calls or leaving the house. 

halfway to goal!

• I have even lost some weight! I set a goal awhile back and I have reached my halfway point. Celebrating being able to get back into some 'skinnier' jeans that have been tucked in the drawer for sometime....

• My sister and her hubby have decided to move 'back home' after being in S. Ca for 30 some years. They will be here next week and I cannot tell you how excited I am over this! I realized the other day that my sister and I have never lived in the same area as adults, where I had the FREEDOM to visit her whenever we wanted. The times she and her husband resided in our county, I was prohibited by the controller I was married to at the time, from having her over or going to her house, unless he approved it. Which wasn't very often. So I am delighted that this option is now before me. Sister-time will be happening on a regular basis!! whoo hoo!

ready for the 4th of July

• Progress-- and I mean GREAT progress has been made with my mom. While she still won't admit she likes her new digs, she has settled in and is opening up more to the other residents and joining in some activities. Other great news is I found a new doctor for her who makes HOUSE CALLS. HELLO!!!  Yes, it's a nurse practitioner and one of the places on their approved list for visiting patients in the facility is right where my mother is living. While I will still be in attendance for those Dr. visits, it is a huge burden lifted to have this service. 

The Bad

• pretty sure my foot still has the stress fracture. but it does feel better... 
• going back to work this week on the regular schedule was a toughie. Today made day 4 and I have tomorrow off and then work Saturday. Yah, even though the boss and I talked and had this cool understanding about me working 3-4 days a week he could not make it happen after all. He is out of the office a lot so I am just getting Fridays off for right now... could be worse.
• torn and undecided now about whether to continue with this job or not. Listing the pros and cons don't add up to much when I am in pain. 
• Work has been pretty much at a standstill for the hubby. Frustrating. We get a lot of phone calls and leads on jobs but they don't pan out or something else comes up. We are holding on, faith is important, trust is important, especially in times like these... like Mother Teresa is credited with saying " God won't give me more than I can handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much."

The Beautiful

• This is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.

• I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

• My grace is sufficient for you,( Says the Lord) My power works best in your weakness.

• I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope.

• We have had sunshine for a week straight and it's been glorious. Not too hot, just perfect summer days, one right after the other.

• I am in love with my husband and he loves me. Super uber goodness right there. 

when your husband writes this in chalk and then nonchalantly walks you passed it on your way home, that's love. 

There is a great big wonderful world waiting outside. I am going out there and gonna REVEL in it!!

Good Byes Just Aren't Fun!

my sister my mom and me!

My sister left today, headed back to Southern California. We had an AWESOME week and I am going to be savoring and processing our time together for some time to come. It was a time for treasuring. whoot whoot!

One groovy thing about having my sister here was that it distracted me from the fact that my husband is not. The emails between he and I have been short and quick and not very satisfying to say the least. We did have a sweet skype date last night with a much better connection than we've had previously. I have made it to the halfway point of his absence and hope the next week and a half will go as quickly as the first half has gone.

The things he has shared with me about the people he has met, and the abject poverty in which they live is so foreign to me, even after experiencing a small taste of this while in Macedonia and Costa Rica. The lives so many of the Hondurans live is beyond what most of us can really take in. I listen as he shares what he has witnessed and I can't even begin to truly process it. I can't imagine what my husband is feeling as he sees it day after day...

For a more indepth look at what the mission of SOR does I would encourage you to visit their website, http://www.sormission.org/ and especially tour their picture page. (each thumbnail picture can be clicked on to make bigger for your viewing pleasure) This website is updated on a weekly basis and the work Terry (Mateo) and Alexandra do is amazing.

So, yes,,,,tonight my house is very quiet and I am both grateful and sad. Grateful for some downtime to reflect on my visit with my sister, on what God is doing in Honduras in the lives of the people, including those with my husband on this mission adventure, and to pray and ponder what God is also doing in my heart. But sad for the good byes and the separation and the time that must pass till we are all back together again.

In Between Posts from Honduras...

there is exciting and fun stuff happening on the home front. YES, sister-time is officially underway!!

It's been just a little over 24 hours since I picked up my sister (older by 5 years) at the airport and started making new memories.

We love to joke, sing, walk, shop, talk and laugh. Sometimes all at the same time and it's one of the few coordinated things we can manage to pull off.

We've gone out for dinner,
 taken a walk,
climbed a mountain,

toured my workplace,
made jam,

gone shopping,
swapped wardrobes,
gone for coffee
and oh, more shopping!

In between our gab sessions I've been getting a few short emails from my hubby and he has gotten pulled under by overexposure to a combination of heat, hard work and different food. He was taking today to recover and hopefully replenish and rehydrate his exhausted system! He was hoping to use today's downtime to write a more lengthy post on what he's been up to and I am eager to hear more. So far our communication has been fraught with technical difficulties and lack of quality time. It has left me feeling frustrated and longing for more.  It's been just one week since he left... and I have plenty to keep me busy and occupied for the week to come, which I am so thankful for! But this being apart just aint easy and there's no denying that. I must remember the verse that the Holy Spirit whispered to me on Easter... "for the joy set before me, I endured the cross..." It gives me strength to face another day. Oh, yes, indeed.

One More Day... One More Week...

I loved the roller coaster at the fair. Not so much loving the ride my emotions are taking as one more sleep brings a good bye. I find myself fighting the tears as another wave of anxiety and fear rises, I bite back words of snarkiness and push down feelings of resentment. I surrender it constantly in prayer and the peace that comes is fleeting but I press in to Jesus even more because I know He is here with me. I know He is walking with Bruce too, as he scrambles to finish his lists, to make sure that things will not unwind and unravel during his absence. He has a lot on his shoulders, both as trip leader and organizer, and as a working man and husband. So many responsibilities to manage.

Yesterday we knocked a considerable chunk off the list as we navigated the stores in search of supplies he still needed. But at one point, I reached my limit as hunger and weariness got the best of me. Bruce knows me well enough to recognize that if he didn't get some food in me real quick he'd lose his personal shopper so he turned the car and headed to Panda Express for some fast, good food!

~songbyrd is full~

Once my taste buds had been satiated and my tummy was pleasingly plump, I slumped back in my chair in a MSG coma and sighed. Loudly. Bruce reached over and squeezed my hand and those blue eyes I love so much twinkled. When I'm happy, he's happy.

That happiness factor is one of the reasons he is so excited for me to have sister-time. One more day till he leaves and just one more week till my sister arrives. Oh my, our calendar has filled up quickly with things we  want to do. Make jam, drive some country roads, see family and friends, visit old stomping grounds, shopping and tulip fields are on the list. And mixed in with all of that is hopefully making some progress at Mom's place with packing and downsizing as we prepare for her move in the very, very near future. Yes, it's going to be a very full week!

my heart, my home

it doesn't take much to make me happy...

a cup of delicious coffee, a chocolate bar, a new box of crayons.
Yes, I said crayons.

I remember in grade school one of the best things about school shopping was the new box of crayons each year. And how over-the-top- excited I was to finally, FINALLY, score the BIG BOX-- the one with the built in crayon sharpener and 64 colors to choose from!

The possibilities for creativity were endless with all those amazing colors. Why settle for orange when there was also 'burnt sienna'?

One of my favorite gifts ever was a special collectors box of crayons my sister sent me back about 25 years ago. I had told her all I wanted was a box of crayons. The big box. I had recently left that first marriage and had lost so many personal possessions and grieved each one, so that in trying to rebuild my life, I told myself to not get attached anymore to just stuff. Keep things simple. And my sister was attempting to honor that request. She sent me the collectors box which came in a cool tin to protect the box. I was ecstatic! For sentimental reasons that box didn't even get broke into and used for a verrrrrrrry long time.

My sister has always had my heart. She gets me in ways that no one else does. Of course we share family history, the legacies of which both laughter and tears are woven into. We went through healing processes together, she often leading the way, holding the flashlight that allowed me to know where to step next. When life moments rise up to make me shriek, it is she who gets the phone call or text asking for H-E-L-P, sometimes even before my husband.

My sister is coming to visit me next month. Part of the package of hubby going away to Honduras on his mission adventure. He will be gone for 3 weeks and my sister will be here with me for one of those three. I am over-the-top excited for her visit! We are already cooking up a list of things to do, places to go, people to see. There won't be enough time to do all we want to do, but really, I just want to keep things simple. Curl up on the couch with mugs of tea and talk and giggle ourselves silly. Pull out the box of memories and share what we've learned from them. Build new memories.

And, maybe, even break out a new box of crayons.

Sister-Time, Sept. 2010. At the Columbia River, WA side.

Date Night

We don't get to go on very many 'real' dates. Either we don't have the funds for it or hubby is working hard and working late and we don't have time for it. We make 'dates' out of the mundane; those trips to the dump,  the hardware store, or whatever errand running we've got on the list. So when we are able to separate the 'things to do' from just relaxing and being a couple in love, oh what a joy!

Last night was one of those rare occasions. Made even rarer since it was A. not an anniversary or a birthday. B. A dark and rainy Friday night and C. hubby got home LATE and I was sure the last thing he would want to do after working hard all day (all week) with a meeting almost every night this past week, would be to turn around and go to town for a cup of coffee and a heart talk.

So kudos to my man for sucking it up and insisting we were still going out. We spent a cozy couple of hours nestled in a buttery leather couch, with our drinks (velvety smooth London Fog for me, kickbutt chocolate Mudslide for him) and without any interruptions, except people watching, we got caught up with one another.

It's been an intense week and I hope to be able to write about it in a few days in a way that helps others, but for now, let's just say that there was a lot of hurt going on in the hearts of many people we care deeply about and it burdened us greatly. There was much prayer and mini conversations happening which was a good thing and while it has not been totally resolved, there have been forward steps taken and the seeds for reconciliation planted. It was good to be able to sit together and reflect over the events of the week the way we did last night. It was a great little date with my honey.

Today, Saturday, is my sister Anita's birthday. She is 5 years older than me and is my closest friend after my husband. we are separated by the miles (she lives in S. CA) but thankfully we have email, facebook, skype and the blogworld to stay connected. Oh, and phones. LOL. Yesterday I called her and told her I thought I'd use an old fashioned device to update her on some things. funny how easy texting and email and instant messaging has replaced those face to face or ear to ear conversations!

Anyway, in honor of my sister's birthday, she is throwing a party over on her blog AniLouMinary. You are invited to drop in and enjoy a slice of joy with her. (You can wear a party hat if you like but it's not required.)

One last thing.... it's time to FALL BACK tonight. Happy weekend everyone!

Sits With Sunglasses

the poke in my eye with the sharp edge of a piece of paper has done nothing for my attitude the last couple of days. I can deal with a lot of things, including pain,  but ongoing pain, especially in the eye, is almost too much. thankfully our eyes tend to heal fast but I have found being outside, where moving air and light are strongest, is too much. Even starting at the computer screen adds strain to my poor eye. It's been an uncomfortable two days. I am sitting in the my house, wearing my sunglasses, administering eye drops every couple of hours and alternating Ibuprofen with Tylenol to try and manage the pain.

it's not working all that well.








On the lighter side of things, I did manage to be productive with a HUGE box of produce hubby brought home the other night. Beans and more beans stacked the bottom of the box, along with several over sized zucchini, some heads of romaine, a passel of carrots, rutabagas and onions and some snap peas to top it off. The first thing I did was sort it all out on my back deck. There were 3 types of beans so I sorted the yellow from the green and the re-sorted the yellow as there were skinny ones and fat/flat ones. From sorting came snipping, followed by washing. Finally they were ready to be blanched and frozen. I prefer freezing over canning and I don't have a pressure cooker anyway. But my freezer has limited space so it was a jigsaw puzzler's challenge to make it all fit!! Along with all the luscious berries and corn on the cob that has gone in in weeks previous, getting in my freezer is a little daunting. But we'll eat well this winter. And some of those berries will be coming out in the next few weeks for jam making. Yum!

I have not  heard anything from the Post Office. I debated contacting them and decided I would wait until Monday, which would make it exactly two weeks since I got my letter with the news of the job. I do recall the man who I met with saying that there was other paperwork shuffling that was taking place in another part of administration and there was no 'usual' time frame to quote me as to when I might hear more. But he seemed confident that I would hear something by that week's end.... and nothing happened. Meanwhile, I have enjoyed this week with no thought of going to work, other than wondering when it would happen.

This week had it's highlights, that is for certain. Monday was the lunch with the girls from high school-- still sighing with delight over that one. Not rushing anywhere all week has been a gift, even if we had monetary setbacks and stresses. Yes, even the pain in my eye cant compete with the peace of knowing God's in charge of ALL THINGS.

my sister and I at the Columbia River, fall of 2010

One more thing I want to mention to wrap up this week.....

A very fun thing I had had the pleasure to be a part of, is helping my SISTER create her own blog!! Using skype to connect and tutor her on blogging has been satisfying and I am just delighted with her launching out this way. You will find her theme of light quite illuminating, if you'll pardon the pun ;) I am sure she would welcome a visit so feel free to pop over to AniLouMinary and take a look.



Have a marvelous weekend friends!

Graduation Part 2

DREAM REALIZATION SCHOOL CHARGE

I am a beloved child of the Most High God.

My place is with Him,

My call is to walk in love;

To bind up the brokenhearted,

To break the chains of bondage,

To engage in the battle raging in the Heavenly realms.

I will walk daily with the Lord in the truth of His Word.

I will teach others to follow His commands,

Be open to the leading of the Holy Spirit,

Walk boldly but with humility,

Using my spiritual gifts to build up the body

and reach the lost for His Glory.

I will live out God's Dream for my life

that I might stand before the Living God having left nothing undone.

This is my charge!

Bruce proudly showing his diploma

I did it!

taking just before graduation begins.  how nice it was for the sun to be out, despite the funky lighting for our picture!!

Graduation was awesome! We had sunshine! We had balloons! We had food and we had joy!

We started with worship, prayer and words of celebration. We had a group photo taken by one of the church staff (I hope we will all be getting a copy) We had a graduation charge giving by Kate along with the craziest funniest but truth-teaching video clip about leadership...(you can watch that here:)   http://youtu.be/fW8amMCVAJQ

Kate's speech-- or charge rather, was moving and inspiring. She is a gifted lady!
Then in our table groups we shared what we each felt was the best thing we got out of DRS. Not surprisingly at my table, one of our highlights was the friendships we made around our table. With tears and laughter we recapped the things that had taken place in our lives over the past 8 months. It was great! We all discovered we were not ready to let go of the sisterhood we developed and have already set a date for getting together again in one month. We would like to continue to do this monthly from now on. This will be powerful fuel for our continuing journey in Christ!

Our final act was to pray for one another (again in our table groups) anointing each other with oil and speaking words of truth and revelations into our lives. IT WAS AMAZING!
And then, we all together lifted our voices to read the charge that this post started with. Then the diplomas were handed out and the party began! Cake! Ice Cream! Cookies! Chocolate! Sparkling Cider! (all the important C's of a party)

moments before people arrived... all the diplomas laid out on the tables.

worship time: I'm trading my sorrows... I'm laying them down for the Joy of the Lord!

Kate (L) presents Anne and Pastor Kim with thank you gifts for all their immeasurable time and gifts they gave this year to our class.  the picture Anne is holding is of a tree, which symbolized the real tree Kate bought for them to plant in their yard; a tree that will forever remind them that we will go on to grow and bear fruit. YAY!

So, Dream School has ended but we have been commissioned so this is not the end but the beginning. We will go and do.... Great things in the Name that is above every other name: Jesus!!