Walking By Faith, Tripping Daily

 

My Faith Walk began as a child of 9, when I asked Jesus to save me. At 9 years of age, it was a simple decision based more on fear of God's Wrath, as the church we attended used a lot of "hell, fire and brimstone" style preaching and not so much about God's love and grace. When I was 14 I made a more 'formal" commitment to follow Christ, a public one followed by being baptized. We were still attending the same church and I believed strongly in being approved by the elders of our congregation. 

When I was 16, my parents loaded up my little brother and me in a motor home and set out on a 4-month journey around the USA. I didn't know it at the time, but my parents had become quite disenchanted with the church we attended. So, it was an eye-opening experiencing for all of us as each week we found ourselves attending different churches of different denominations. I was amazed to experience churches that had live music, even drums! (our church had no musical instruments not even a piano, everything was sung acapella and sounded like a dirge!) I was amazed to experience churches where the LOVE and GRACE of Christ was first and foremost expressed. Upon returning home my parents officially left that church and started attending another church that was a bible based evangelical conservative that preached hope and joy in following Christ. 

I attended the youth group and enjoyed the time there but it wasn't long after our return home from the trip that I started dating the young man who I would eventually marry (and later divorce but that's a story for another time) Because of him I started going to the church his family belonged to, getting involved with their youth group and experiencing another denomination that was different in many ways from what I had so far been exposed to. It was good; bible based but more liberal. It became my church home for many, many years. I had many great experiences over those years that taught me more about Christ's love, forgiveness and grace. After my divorce, my church family was instrumental in guiding me along a path of healing from the years of trauma I'd lived through. It was also through this church that I met the love of my life and we married and we began serving together in our community.

About 15 years ago after growing more and more uncomfortable with some of the liberal choices taking place in the denomination and we made another switch to a non-denominational conservative evangelical church that more closely aligned with our interpretation of the bible.

All of this to say.... I've been on this Faith Journey for a LOT of years. I stumble, trip, and fall more than I like to admit. There's been times I've gotten off the path, gotten lost, made big messes and struggled to find my way back but even in those times of feeling lost, I didn't lose my faith in Christ. Jesus has been faithful in meeting me, bringing me back to His True Path and loving me despite all of my failings.

So, yes, I walk by faith. And I trip daily. And I get back up and go again. 

It Starts With Worship

All week I've been humming or singing the words from a song by Matt Redmond. It's called "The Heart of Worship" and it is a powerful reminder to me of what Worship is... and what it isn't.

It is absolutely true that God deserves our worship. Scripture says if we don't praise Him, the rocks will cry out. And when you look around at creation, a crashing wave, a soaring eagle, a mountain splendor, can't you see the glory of God? Does your heart swell like mine does, in giving thanks and praise to Him for creating such wonders? 

Over and over in the bible we find verses on worship, of praising God. Like most people, I first and foremost tend to think of singing  when I hear the word worship. I read somewhere the other day that music is the one thing that affects more parts of our brain than anything else. Music stirs the heart and emotions and stimulates the brain and becomes imprinted in ways like nothing else. So it's no wonder than that we often think of music and worship simultaneously. 

The story about the song "Heart of Worship" goes something like this: the pastor of the church where songwriter Matt Redman attended, deeply concerned with an attitude of apathy sweeping through the church, got rid of the sound system and instruments for a season. For many Sundays it was just the voices of the people being lifted as they gathered.  The idea was to find their way back to the true heart of Worship and the only way to do it was to strip everything away. The pastor began asking the congregation "When you come through the doors on Sunday what are you bringing as your offering to God?" Initially that led to some awkward silence but eventually people began to break out in spontaneous, genuine, heartfelt praise to God. They found their way back to the True Heart of Worship.

When the music fades
All is stripped away
And I simply come
Longing just to bring
Something that's of worth
That will bless your heart

Worship is all about the position of my heart.

When I have challenges or things just don't seem to be very positive, it's very easy to lose focus and go the way of the grumpies. From there it's a slippery slope into cranky-ville. But having the right position in my heart allows me to put my focus on God rather than the difficulties I'm having.

One of the best depression-busters I've found is to put on worship and praise music and flood my soul with it. When I step into worshipping Him, it reminds me of His faithfulness. It also reminds me that worship does not stop when the music does.

Everything I do as a Christian, can --and should be-- done as an Act of Worship. For me that equates out to taking care of my household in ways that honor God. Living within our budget. Serving others with love. Being responsible with the things God has given me to care for. Valuing friendship. Honoring marriage and my husband. Even, yes, even taking my anti-depressant can be an Act of Worship.

We all worship something. I want what I worship to be Jesus.

King of endless worth
No one could express
How much you deserve
Though I'm weak and poor
All I have is yours
Every single breath

Worship sets the stage for me to walk forward with Jesus.

Our pastor asked the question last week, "When was the last time you had a planning session with God about your future?" It brought me up short, because, even as I start my day with devotions and prayer, my goals are usually short term-- 'help me get through this day' seems to be the MO of most of my morning pleas. But if I am going to live the life of a true worshipper, who has Christ at the center, I must think and plan strategically about my future. At my age that might seem a little late to the game, but until Christ calls me home, I have work here to do on earth and I want it to count for something. I don't need to map out the rest of my life, or even the rest of my year but I do feel I need to submit daily to whatever calling He has on my life today. And if He has stuff for me to do (which I am sure He does!) I need to be in a position that is ready and willing to do it. The positioning starts with Worship.


I'll bring You more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what You have required
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart

I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about You
It's all about You, Jesus
I'm sorry, Lord, for the thing I've made it
When it's all about You
It's all about You, Jesus

Yes. It's all about You, Jesus.