the curse of the dreaded fibro-fog

it was a dark and stormy night.... Oh wait, that's the beginning of a bad novel.This is just a blog post and I don't want it to read like a soap opera turned horror flick. No, this is just your average tale about a modern day woman who occasionally suffers from a malady known as Fibromyalgia.

Fibromyalgia, for those who may not know, is one of those chronic ailments that are widely misunderstood but had gained much attention in recent years as more and more people become diagnosed with it and doctors scramble to learn the cause and subsequent treatment of it. Fibromyalgia, or FM for abbreviation purposes, is characterized by wide spread pain that does not seem to be related to one specific cause. Its not arthritis, or bursitis, it's not a flu or virus, though when in a fibro-flair up, I often feel like I have the flu... or that I've been run over by a semi.

I was diagnosed with FM about 10 or 12 years ago. Back then there were not many doctors in our neck of the woods who knew what to do with the diagnosis. I saw a specialist for awhile (back in the good old days when we had health insurance) and the most common treatment was putting us on anti-psychotic medication. (Crazy right?) The premise was that it would raise the serotonin levels which would help combat pain. I can't vouch for anyone else but after a horrible trial run with several different med's which made me feel crazy, I said "enough with that!" and decided to go with a more holistic approach. During that time I took a leave of absence from my job (I was driving school bus at the time and calling in sick way too much) and concentrated on trying to find answers to my problem. I was blessed to stumble across a chiropractor who practiced natural techniques.  Within the first couple of treatments I was experiencing less pain than I had in months. I kept up a regime of regular visits to his office, taking supplements and incorporating exercise as much as my body could tolerate. (A few years later when I opened up our Curves for Women's Fitness Center, I was really able to keep up my exercise, and thankfully with a workout that was easy for me to handle. It was a win-win for me.)

this helps keep me going when the going gets really tough. 

Getting adequate sleep is also important but the sleep issue is often trickier to manage as insomnia is one of the trademarks of this debilitating ailment. In addition to insomnia, joint pain and stiffness, there is irritable bowel syndrome, fatigue, difficulty swallowing, and cognitive dysfunction. Or, as some of us call it "fibro-fog". (Today for instance, it's taken me most of the day to put together this post, something I usually knock out in a relatively short amount of time.)

A few years ago I made the discovery about my intolerance for gluten. Once I removed gluten from my diet I noticed a dramatic difference as far as inflammation goes. Now, when I do have a flare up, I can usually trace it back to something I ate the day before that was on the No-No list. ( this often occurs after eating out, as I can't control what goes into restaurant prepared food.) Despite the tricks I have learned to help keep this nasty condition at bay, I can't guarantee it wont rear its ugly head and render me useless.

don't bug me. I'm sleeping.

So, it wasn't a dark and stormy night after all. It was a dark and stormy Morning. One of those mornings where it hurts to even open my eyes.  Where it feels like someone poured cement into my joints and its quick setting cement.  Where mass amounts of coffee still wont make the brain fog lift.  On these days it would be better for me to just crawl back in bed and sleep. Or so one would think. But I find sleep just as elusive on these days as I do most nights. And sleep doesn't necessarily relieve the joint pain and stiffness. It's usually better for me to move, painful as it may be. So, this morning, if you saw someone stumbling down the road, with her ass dragging on the heels of her shoes, looking like a zombie... yah, that'd be me.

Chicken Noodle Soup

Isn't it amazing how quickly a head cold can come on and render you useless? I watched my poor husband come home last night saying he felt a little tickle in his throat. I scrambled for the Airborne but by the time he had tumbled into bed I could tell he was feeling miserable. Sounding miserable too. This morning it's full blown congestion , sore throat and the need for sleep more than anything else. We're drinking our Airborne together now so that I don't catch it and I think some homemade chicken soup is on the menu for today.

Keep warm, keep healthy friends. The 'season' of nasty has begun!!

Autumn Recap

you all know by now that  I love fall! The crispness of the season, that sweet aroma drifting in through the open bedroom window as I fall asleep. The Kodachrome of colors on my mountain, that first pumpkin spice latte of the season (I refuse to drink pumpkiny drinks till the first day of fall-- had mine yesterday and it was scrump-delicious!)

**

Yesterday was a bittersweet day however, even as I did celebrate Autumn's official arrival by getting my latte. Yesterday was the memorial for our friend Michael. What a tribute! Have you ever attended a memorial service that was almost pure Worship? Where people were clapping their hands and CHEERING as they sang? The JOY that filled the place was overwhelming!! The lump in my throat competed with the tightness in my chest and I clapped so hard my hands tingled. We listened to his children and siblings pay him homage and cried with Catherine, his bride of nearly 16 years, as a letter she had penned was shared. Oh, it was hard. It was sad. But it was joyful! How do you explain such joy in the face of such sorrow? Only because of the HOPE we have in Jesus Christ.

**

Last night my husband and I sat and talked about faith. He credits me with a strong unshakable faith and I believe this is a gift God has given me. I've been through my share of heart ache and tough times but my faith in God is firm. I don't know why I have been given this gift but I do see it as exactly that. Despite the financial hardships we have faced, and continue to struggle with, I see God's Sovereign Hand on us and our situation. Faith doesn't come as easily for my husband and I pray for him to be granted extra faith and for it come easier to him.

**

I curled up in blankets last night and watched the fire burn in our woodstove as I drank hot tea, and sucked on throat lozenges. I could feel the aches and pains coming in stronger like the tide and my throat constricting. I was sniffly and sneezy and sleep was a welcome reprieve. I woke up early this morning, stuffed up and woozy headed and slothed my way downstairs for more Airborn. I don't wanna be sick!!

Hubby went on to church without me this morning and I watched church on the live-feed and felt nourished. I am feeling clearer headed now and less achy. I have learned to give in at the first sign of a cold, and soak up as much sleep and Vitamin C as I possible can and you know what? I usually kick whatever little bug is threatening me in the behind before it has a chance to roost. The sun, pale and thin, is still promising this day to be pleasant. It's the kind of day for wearing sweaters and socks but it's still a day that begs us come outside. We had originally had plans to host a small group fall kick off mini retreat but we had so many of our couples cancel that we canceled it as well! Which means this afternoon is a GIFT as we now have an open slot for an unplanned event! And if I feel strong enough we are going to take advantage of this opening and go play!!!

May you be blessed in the day~~ and my FAITH be granted unto you as well as JOY HOPE and LOVE.

Invitation to the Party

My heart is sorrow filled even as I cling to the peace that passes understanding. Dear friends of ours are facing the toughest, darkest moment as a battle with cancer nears the end.....

Michael had a bone marrow transplant several months ago and was doing well.... but last week found him back in ICU down in Seattle with a serious lung infection and Graft VS Host Disease present....  the doctors have been doing everything they can to bring it under control.... there have been several serious heart episodes on top of it all.... and now it seems Jesus has issued the invitation for Michael to come home. 

this excerpt, from  Michael's Caring Bridge Journal, written by his beautiful wife Catherine, gives a taste of the commitment and faith that is sustaining them during this very painful and difficult time.

This morning as I was wrestling with my God, feeling at times the frantic desperation that sucks the very breath out of me, and surrendering to the sweet peace that passes understanding, I received a gift from the Lord. He told me that 'Preparations were being made for my beloved husbands Home Coming Party. There was a lot to do, and all the invitations were sent out throughout the heavens and the saints were gathering.One of the first people in line to greet him after Jesus was going to be Job. As they see each other for the first time, there is instant recognition and they embrace as two valiant men that God has found blameless and upright. All heaven cheers....'

please hold this precious family in your prayers as the end is so very near.