He Said "Yes"

I love it when things come together. When a plan I hatch, crazy as it may seem, doesn't scramble like eggs but rather sets up nicely, like pudding. And I do love to plan things. Much as I am a 'fly by the seat of my pants' girl, I also pay attention to details and plot out the arrangements for weeks in advance. But those impulsive last minute decisions are just plain fun. Dangerous perhaps, but FUN!

I think I've shared a bit about how the Love-Burkes came to be, but you know it's almost spring time when the memories and pictures start making their annual appearance! Our first date was on March 20, 1994-- 20 years ago this year!!- which is also the first day of Spring! I love that our love story coincides with the arrival of a new season... as the buds are busting out on the trees and blooms appear, so it was with the friendship between us that quickly progressed to love.

What you may not know is that I'm the one who asked him out. I'd been so stand-offish in the past several encounters we'd had, kind of leaving him with Freezer Burn, so when I suddenly began to thaw-- even melt, he was, not surprisingly, a wee bit suspicious and perhaps gun shy of thinking we might possible move into a relationship. I dropped some subtle hints that might prod him into asking me out but when that didn't seem to be yielding the results I wanted, I finally had to just get bold and do the asking.

You will laugh at this, but I actually scripted out what I was going to say once I got him on the phone. I wanted the conversation to be causal and non-threatening, just a "hey I was thinking of going to the movies this weekend, you wanna tag along" sort of invite. So, I wrote it out, a couple of different ways, then pacing the hallway of my home, I practiced. When I thought I finally had it down I dialed his number quickly before I lost my nerve. I pitched my invitation in an airy, off handed way... "So... after that discussion we had about the movie Schindler's List, I decided I'm going to go see it on Sunday. I wondered if maybe you'd like to go along?"

April 1994, after we'd been dating for about a month

There was a silence on his end, for probably a second or two, but from my perspective it was a LONG silence. I have since learned so much about my man, that I can now picture exactly the look on his face and hear the wheels turning in his head as he processed this seemingly out of the blue request.

Then, mercifully, he said yes.

And, the rest, as they say,  is history.

He's Home and I'm Happy

Reunited and it feels so good!

Yes, all is right with my world again. Hubby is home, safe and sound with many amazing stories to share with me and thoughts to process. He got in late Friday night and we had a sweet lazy day Saturday to sip coffee (Honduran of course) unpack and talk, talk, talk! He napped a lot-- jetlag you know-- and I was happy to watch him sleep. We went to church Saturday night and had a great time chatting with our church family.

This morning we were up bright and early and on the road by 8am for a little island get-away. We parked our car at the Anacortes Ferry Landing and did a walk-on to the ferry and headed out to Friday Harbor, San Juan Island. What a fantastic day for an island excursion!

 The temp's were soaring in the high 70's which is pretty amazing for this time of year. We love riding the ferry and today was no exception. Bruce is still in recovery mode however so naps were snuck in when ever he could....

We enjoyed some good island coffee and ice cream, wandered the docks and dreamed about boats,

climbed the stairs and let the sun kiss our faces, tourist-shopped the stores and winded our way back down to the wharf for a delicious lunch of crab cakes, fries and cole slaw, washed down with ice cold root beer.

We watched the boats sailing on the water, got a little sunburnt and just reveled in each other's company. A sweet, sweet time.

We caught an afternoon ferry home and meandered the back roads to home. All in all a truly romantic and most satisfying day.

Date~A~Versary!

Once upon a time, a spunky young lady dared to ask a shaggy haired bachelor out on a date!

This was after the Tall Timber Snow Retreat/How we met weekend..... We'd been carpooling to our church volleyball league for a few weeks, going out for coffee with the team after the game. It was all casual and friendly and a lot of fun but I sensed what was building between us could use a little more exploration, best done in a more intimate setting. At coffee one night we talked about a very popular movie playing in the theaters at the time: Schindler's List. Neither of us had seen it and I casually but very intentionally said I would really like to go.... giving him the perfect opening should he take the hint. He didn't respond but I wasn't put off. After all, I'm the girl who rattled him only a few weeks prior with my allergic to men comment. Why would he want to intentionally date me?

I called him a couple of nights later and after a bit of small talk, announced that I had decided to go see the movie that coming Sunday and wondered if perhaps he'd like to join me? There was a moment of silence on the other end of the phone and I thought perhaps I'd shocked him with my straightforwardness.... but once he'd recovered, he seemed amiable to the suggestion and a date was indeed made!

We agreed to meet at the same location we'd been meeting for carpooling.... a local grocery that bills "where friends meet friends" on their store front. Before the day of our date rolled around however, he upped the ante. He asked me if I would like to go for dinner after the movie (we were going to the matinee) and that's when I started thinking this might really be a DATE!!! Not just two pals taking in a movie, but a real Date. Like Capital D.
GULP.
Suddenly I was all a flutter.

I jokingly told a friend I'd know by the choice of restaurant whether he was thinking serious thoughts about us or not. I said, "If he takes me to -- oh, I don't know, McDonalds, it means he just wants to be friends. but if he takes me to... someplace like... The Black Angus (my favorite place but he didn't know that!) then it means he's  really interested in me." LOL, I remember my friend said "he'll probably take you someplace in the middle-- like Sizzler's."

Hmmmm.

Sunday, March 20th, rolled around. It was the 1st day of Spring and I thought what a significant thing this was. Spring to me signifies the birth of newness. And our willingness to explore taking our friendship to perhaps a new level by going out seemed like the birth of newness as well. I was getting nervous and I can only imagine what was going on in his head and heart as he prepared to meet me that day. I tried very hard to  maintain my cool but I remember pulling into the parking lot at the grocery store and seeing him in his car and our eyes meeting and thinking who was I kidding, meeting like this was just a carpool to the movies instead of volleyball type event, when it was really and truly an honest to goodness date.
Capital D.
More GULPING.
More fluttering.

Well... the movie was amazing. Schindler's List is a serious mind-blowing account of the Holocaust and one brave man's attempt to save as many Jews as he possible could. It was not the sort of movie you go to and come away from untouched. You don't make small talk after a movie like that. We sat in silence when the movie ended and then walked shoulder to shoulder back to his car. Inside the vehicle he reached over and squeezed my hand. "Thank you for asking me to come with you to see this movie." was what he said but I felt more than a simple thanks in that gesture.

He drove out of the parking lot asking me if I had any preference on where we went for dinner. We were just down the road from The Black Angus but I was not going to suggest it. I shrugged and said anyplace would be fine.... and he drove to The Black Angus!! Scoring multiple points!!!

Oh yah, this was definitely a Capitol D date.

We sat in a booth and started talking. We talked about everything; single parenting (he had a 15 year old son he was raising alone, I had my 12 year old daughter living with me and a 15 year old son who was living with his father) We talked about our work, our faith and our families. Of course we discussed the movie and other movies we'd seen. We talked throughout dinner and were still talking as the waitress pointedly removed our plates, brought us the check and made uncomfortable noises as she walked past our booth... and we finally realized how late it was and that the place was closing.

Back in his car he held my hand as he pulled out of the parking lot. There was a beautiful moon on the rise and as he passed the lake and the pretty little park on the edge of the lake he asked if I would mind if he pulled over there.... and hastened to assure me it was because he just didn't want the evening to end, he was enjoying our conversation so much and could we prolong it by looking at the moon on the water? And I never for one second thought that seemed scary or like a line out of a movie but was enchanted by the whole idea. So when we had talked for another hour or more and our eyes met in the moon-lit front seat of his car and we found we couldn't break away from the gazes, it seemed only natural and perfect for our first kiss to take place....

and it was the stuff they write about in romance novels.....

You can understand, perhaps, why we still celebrate every year on the 1st day of spring, that first date. It was, and is, a perfect first date.
Capitol D.

practice makes perfect ;)

the story of us part 2

Part Two of the story of us.... you can read Part One here


That weekend at Tall Timber in 1994 was magical. I went just hoping for some fun and relaxation, never expecting to come home with such peace and joy in my heart. On Saturday of that weekend everyone was setting out to ski up to White River Falls, about a 3 mile trip. I had not planned to ski but was persuaded to join by the rest. Reluctant, because of my apprehension of falling down and looking foolish, I became even more nervous when I realized everyone had headed up the hill with out me. Everyone except...

Yes, that's right. The shaggy-blond nice guy had hung back and waited for me! Even after I had told him I was allergic to men!! Great. Now I had to worry about making intelligent conversation as well as staying upright! Yet we hadn't gone very far before I realized the conversation was actually flowing pretty easily between us. I had let down my guard and pretty soon we were laughing and having a great time! I fell once and landed pretty hard on my side. It's not easy to get back up when you are on skies and it's not easy to help someone else get up when you are skies either. So pretty much all he could do was offer encouragement as I struggled to my feet. I think the confidence in his voice was what did it. He believed I could and so, I did.

By the time we'd made it to the waterfalls I knew I'd made a friend for life. By the time the weekend was over I knew I was going to marry him. Yes, marry him! It wasn't love at first sight-- it was just a very, very strong inkling that our future was to be together.

Wrapped up in the thawing of my heart towards this very nice man was the healing that God was doing through His Word. That line out of the 23rd Psalm, He restores my soul, was still bouncing around inside me. As I pondered that line I became aware of God really speaking to me. It felt like that scripture verse was reverberating in the deepest of my being. God was speaking to me directly. God was telling me He would restore all my broken places, I just needed to give Him all the pieces.

It was the beginning of a beautiful healing process that has continued all this time. I was falling in love with Jesus in a way that was new to me. I find it fascinating that my relationship with Jesus was developing in a deeper way at the same time that a new relationship was being forged with the man who eventually would become my partner for life.

After we returned home from the weekend some surreptitious planning on my part found us carpooling to church volleyball  together and from there our first date (will save that for another post) took place. We dated for 2 years... and I was ready and waiting for us to take things to the next level!!

So.... TWO years... almost to the day, we were back at Tall Timber for another snow retreat with the church youth group. Another trek to the waterfall on skis was planned for Saturday afternoon. I was hoping this would be the setting for the question I had been longing for for some time... we'd recently moved from the If we get married stage of conversation to the When we get married, and I almost didn't go with the group to ski because I was so afraid it wouldn't happen and I wasn't sure I could gracefully handle the disappointment if he didn't propose...

a friend snapped this photo and then discreetly disappeared... moments before he popped the question...

But I wasn't disappointed. When we at last found ourselves alone, with just the sound of the mighty White River roaring over the rocks behind us, he knelt in the snow before me and produced a sweet little teddy bear from his backpack. When I saw the zipper in the tummy of the bear I knew... but when he pulled the ring out and offered it to me, then the tears of happiness began to flow.

God started something powerful that first weekend in 1994 and in 1996 He brought us another step closer to becoming the couple He intended us to be. Now, here we are 19 years later since that first weekend at camp, 17 years since he asked me to marry him.

it's been a wild, wacky, wonderful adventure together with only more wild wacky wonderful to come. Happy Engage-versary sweetheart!

the story of us

some of my favorite bloggers did some sweet 'how we met' posts last month, for Valentines Day and anniversary celebrations. I'm not copying. I have been thinking about doing a story of us for awhile now and with March 2nd being the 17th anniversary of our engagement... it just seemed like the right time to write this. 

I first met him at Tall Timber Ranch when our churches annual youth/snow retreat was taking place. He was the youth leader at his church and had a rowdy bunch of monkeys under his watchful eye. It was the first time I'd been to Tall Timber and was totally blown away by the raw beauty of this wintry wonderland.

In the interest of full disclosure, I was still married to my first husband and the meeting of this tall shaggy bachelor was barely a blip on my radar. he was just a guy with a bunch of hoodlums to take care of. I thought he seemed like a quiet, kind man and that was that.

Fast forward a few years.... by now I'd gone through an ugly divorce and was slowing trying to rebuild my life as single parent. The annual trek to Tall Timber was a welcome respite and the promise of fun, relaxation and little, if any, responsibilities, sounded too good to pass up. I signed up my then 12 year old  daughter and myself for the retreat. I thought I would play in the snow a little, read some books by the fire and maybe, even let my battered heart soak up some healing in God's country. I had no idea what letting my heart out of it's protective cage was going to lead to...

Bruce tells the funny story of how the day he saw me in the church parking lot, as we loaded up the caravans to head out, he approached me, with a twinkle in his eye and a teasing smile to ask for my permission slip to attend. Funny man. I gave him a snappy come back about my permission slip and said something about having filled out the allergy form. He asked if I was allergic to snow. Now mind you, I'd been hurt so bad in the past that I didn't trust myself, let alone some guy, no matter how nice his smile. My flippant retort was "No, I'm allergic to MEN."

Ouch. Freezer burn from the ice princess, Bruce decided to stay clear of me all weekend.

But something happened once I arrived at the camp. That stunning raw beauty of the place, being unplugged from all stress and responsibilities for a few days, and the very real and very overwhelming presence of the Holy Spirit was so strong, it was impossible for me to continue to hold onto the fortress I'd so carefully constructed around my heart. Within the first 12 hours of being there I felt a release. A thawing. I think I began to understand how heavy and tiring it was to keep that wall in place. When the couple facilitating the weekend led us in a meditation of the 23rd Psalm and we got to the verse "He restores my soul" the words resounded in my heart and soul. And some healing began...

to be continued....

Oh, Orcas, You Had Me at Hello

the islands beckon.... 

it's after glow time.... time for reflecting on our precious time away.

it's really nice having a family member with a plane. 

really nice to have invitations issued to 

come join them in the islands for a little get away!

flying out of Bellingham in brother Clint's Cessna.... 

leaving dark gray skies with threatening raindrops behind, 

flying into a little slice of  blue heaven.

meeting sister in law Jan's family-- 

she has so many sisters I still can't keep them straight! 

plus....  husbands, some children and a couple of dogs. 

They had rented 3 cabins for the week and 

everyone was migrating and mingling between the three. 

chaos. 

planning.

fun.

walking on the beach...  

river otters. kingfishers. kelp. boats. sea shells.

dinner in town, facing the eastsound bay. 

flat iron steaks, garlic mashed potatoes, comfort food. 

laughter & conversation.

campfire on the beach, guitar playing & singing. 

who cares if some rain sprinkled?

sleeping in a warm bed, deep under the covers. 

fresh salt air.

coffee on the beach watching the sun come alive. breakfast together....

driving around the island, enjoying the views, 

stopping for lunch in Olga, sweet little art gallery and cafe, 

an even sweeter little gift from hubby.... 

love you to the moon and back....

flying back home, reluctant to leave...cherishing the time together....

until next time, Orcas Island.