I have to leave soon for work and my bottom is dragging along with every other inch of me. Can I write something blog worthy in the few minutes I have and if I do will it make any difference? That sounds like a pretty negative question and I guess that might be summing up my attitude this day. perhaps this week. wondering if the things I do make a difference. I have been trying for weeks-- actually months-- to lose just a few pounds and have been pretty much denied that. I have counted calories, counted points and documented every thing I put in my mouth. I have exercised, made healthy choices and lost the same 2 lbs countless times over. I am about ready to give up. I think my grumpy negative mood is probably tied in with the changes around here that I am still adjusting to. I am nervous about the future and I am not usually this way. I am pretty trusting and faithful by nature, and I know God has kept us safe and well cared for through many a tough dry time. Why should this be any different? Perhaps in the 4 months hubby was working as an employee, I got 'used to' the regular pay periods and now going back to the ups and downs has me feeling a little ill. I am also questioning the ability to do the job I applied for and I haven't even GOT the job yet!!
This is not like me, honest. I really try to project a positive attitude and only let my doubts surface in private with a special trusted friend. But I also want to be honest and transparent on my blog because if someone who is struggling with life, drops by and reads this, it can sometimes help to know you are not alone. And that even happy positive people have down days. And that's okay. And I am always reminded that no matter what I face I don't face it alone. Even Jesus had difficult days, right? He withdrew to meet with his Father for prayer and supplication. I can do the same.
I have to leave for work but I am noticing a gentle shift in my head and heart. Writing always seems to bring a release of some sort and with that a balm. Thank you Jesus for the gift that writing is for me. Now, off to work.... bringing some light to others....
No comments:
Post a Comment
thank you so much for taking time to read and comment! have a great day!